My brother, Michael, stayed at my house a few days and said that I am obsessed with food, and that he was uncomfortable eating with me, believing that I am judging him for eating “badly.” “I like to eat what I want,” he said, “and if it means I live a couple of years less, who cares. I’m not willing to give up those foods I like so much.” My argument about how some people get their endorphin high from food instead of exercise doesn’t seem to apply in his case, because for many years he did triathlons, and at 53 still does one leg of those races. He also goes to the gym once a week or more.

When I mentioned that maybe his diet and high cholesterol numbers—I think he is near the 240-plus that I read is heart attack range—might cost him 10 or 20 years, not just two, and that he was setting himself up for a heart attack, he said that I was overreacting. He pointed out that our father had a cholesterol count of 300 and lived to 88. It’s just genetic for him, and nothing he does lowers his count. So why worry about high numbers or attempt to do anything that isn’t going change them.

HERE IS MY BROTHER’S RESPONSE TO THE TWO PARAGRAPHS ABOVE.

Ira, a couple of things as I remember them:

I observed that you are obsessed with Dying, and eating correctly is a part of that. You are obsessed over cholesterol, I am less of a fanatic. I am not “uncomfortable” eating with you, I enjoy eating with you, we have great conversations. I feel that you are often lecturing that “what works for you” should be the standard for everyone. I have read many relatively new reports that imply that the cholesterol connection has been flawed, and we have 3 generations of doctors who have been taught that this is gospel. The AMA doesn’t want to admit they made a mistake! They don’t want to tell you that cholesterol is totally necessary for proper brain function, and that the drugs they have prescribed for years may be the cause of some alzheimers patients, in addition to the known liver damage, kidney damage, and possibly cancers people seem to be having.

I don’t give up anything, but I eat and drink everything in moderation. When at your house, I eat all those great cheeses you supposedly buy for us. I never have them (unless someone gives them as presents) except at your house, or the occasional party. Are you then buying them for us, or for you?

I don’t get an endorphin high from eating, or biking, or running, or cycling, or tennis. No need to go into details about when I do get that high by the way!

My cholesterol is around 235. Doctors (who insist it should be under 200) still want to put me on cholesterol medicine to bring it down. I refuse—the fix is more damaging then the cholesterol. I am not a heart attack candidate, I am not significantly overweight, I can out run, out swim, and out cycle most of my peers, and many who are 15 years younger than me. My heart rate after 40 minutes of cycling cardio (3 – 3.5 minute miles by the way) is around 126 bpm. When I am pushing myself it is up around 150.

My total cholesterol number is only that…a number. What is important is my ratio of good to bad cholesterol. Depending what I have eaten the week before the test, it is around 1 to 3. When I was 30 it was 1 to 6 and my cholesterol was 285. I can totally manipulate the test results in only a week, doesn’t seem to me it is a lasting effect, just a measuring tape in the physicians toolbox.

A 40-week pregnancy is an average. Medical experts are trying to make us all fit the average in everything we do. They drug a woman to induce a child now if they are a week late. They rush her to a hospital like it is a crisis if she is more than a week early. If you remember your statistics, we (over 95%) fall into 3 standard deviations on either side of the average. That goes for cholesterol, height/weight, intelligence and other things having to do with our species. Some of us aren’t ready for college at 18, doesn’t make us stupid, losers, A.D.D. or plumbers! Again, just an average age of maturity, but a standard that is imposed on the masses, wrecking many lives and dreams.

I think your site is great. The abs thing is a goal, a measure of something most 40 year olds can’t imagine achieving, let alone those approaching 70. I wouldn’t put any pictures of overweight people on your site (unless it is a before picture, with a better after picture). They are not your goal. The nun who runs ironman triathlons wasn’t showing her abs, not showing off, not denigrating those who can’t do what she does. She (like you) was showing that she can do something that most people feel they cannot. We can achieve what we dream at any age. We just have to be willing and able to make the sacrifices to attain it. As our father quoted “What do you want? How bad do you want it?…and What are you willing to do/give up to get it?” Your website is not for everyone. It is for the people in those standard deviations that fall outside the masses, or hopefully for some of the average people who want to be something else, and need some inspiration to do it.

Love you bro. We appreciate your wonderful hospitality, and all of us had a great time. I am very relaxed, I played in the snow, rode “your” motorcycle; skied, and watched our children and your grandchildren enjoy the benefits of a household “outside of the norm.” If you want to publish your version and use mine as the “rebuttal,” feel free!

Keep up the good work.

Michael